Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy

Motherhood is something that feels so natural to me, but seems so weird when you stop to think about it.

We are responsible for this little person, that my husband and I made and I continued to grow inside of my body. At about 10 months, doctors decided to evict said little person, and after 3 days in the hospital, she was sent home with us, the only real requirements being that we would bring her for a follow up doctor appointment and knew how to put her in a car seat.

When we first brought her home, I kept thinking that I needed some proof of documentation that she was indeed mine. Like I was going to be carded for having a baby. As time has gone by, I feel she is ours more and more, not just a little love that we're watching temporarily.

If children were adults, they would be the moochiest freeloaders ever. Sometimes, I think, "Boy, she's just getting so big, look at all the things she can do." But really, she's a blob. She naps like 3 - 5 hours a day, sleeps 12 hours a night and still has the audacity to be cranky and tired throughout the day. Same goes for eating. How can you eat like 5 - 7 times a day and still act like you've been starving at every meal, unable to wait for your mother to even move her shirt to expose her boob enough for you to latch. And still, we do this every meal.

But still, this helpless yet defiantly independent person teaches you so many new things. She has brought so much joy and love into my life that I didn't know was missing. Our Nina is such a happy little girl most of the time, its just infectious. I am happier because of her. If she's ok, then I really have no reason not to be happy. I want to smile because she is smiling, or I want to smile to make her smile. I want to be silly and fun to make her laugh. I want everything to be OK so she never has to be sad or cry in pain or distress. I can't think about her without being happy.

I love my husband so much more because he brought this sweet little person into the world with me. I love him more because when I see how much he loves his little girl my heart melts. I love him because he can make her laugh and smile even better than me and I think that makes him an awesome parent. I love how they have this easy camaraderie where she just trusts that he knows what he's doing to and follows his lead when he's in charge. I love overhearing him telling her silly things or making fun of me.    

Overall, I have to say life is just wonderful right now. I know that its not always going to be and that parenthood comes with its share of challenges but we've been so blessed for these past 6 months and I wouldn't trade a minute for anything.